On people who post about subject registration even though I haven't registered yet,

"Oh please la, as if you are the only bugger in the entire freaking MMU that is so excited about registering for the next semester subjects. Of course la, dah la your course so easy, it being MANAGEMENT, and us engineering students aren't as fortunate like all of you to get A's for entire semester. Do me a favour: shut up."


On a roomie who, has a gaming machine,

"Bro, you have a flipping strong gaming monster, it doesn't mean that you have to put every setting in games to HIGH or ADVANCED or I CAN SEE CHIN HAIR kind of detail. It will tax out your graphic card faster than a student in an engineering faculty studying for his finals."

About boyfriends - Ones that are being commanded by their girls

"Hey man, look, I know she didn't want you to buy that PS3 game. But why she didn't want you to buy it?
Huh? You mean she just don't want you to buy it? Don't care la, just go Toys R Us and buy it! Still you cannot?
Ok tell you what, let's book a ticket for two to Bangkok and a reservation for one at a plastic surgeon to have your balls removed. Don't worry, I'll pay.. its for your own good. Until you can stand up to your gal, your proof of fatherhood will remain in that jar of formaldehyde over there. Yeah, in the Donations section."


About the current heatwave in Cyberjaya, Seremban, Penang, etc,

" Why is it so hot?? Mau terbakar okay. Even shirts off, doors open, windows wider than a Najib's election smile, it still as blazing as holy hell. Rasa macam want to break open a bomba pipe and shower myself. Or even to take my pillows and blanket to camp out at MMU's library air-conditioned foyer."


On the recent price hike on sugar,

"If our prices are still low compared to other SEA countries, lets keep it that way? Or the saved money from cutting back subsidies because you need another RM100 million to keep your wife's wig on her head is that it? Eh, Najib?
Also, I wouldn't be surprised if a regular nasi goreng would cost RM10 in the future, a teh o ais limau will cost rm5. "

This post I solely dedicate to.. my mother.

I can't believe I became an asshole twice over at the eve of Mother's day. This post is just but a small expression of me begging for forgiveness as well as wishing a Happy Mother's Day.

I am not a poet, I am hardly a talented writer. I write as a form of expression, like how people play music to express themselves as well as art.

Today, I want to express what I feel to my mother, in this little corner of the Internet, and hope for her to see it to forgive me and bless me for my examination in the coming days.

Dear Mummy,

I am sorry for all the trouble I have caused lately. Although I have meant this many times, I still repeat it over and over again. Sometimes I wonder why, when I fight back and retaliate with you and Paps, I feel so horrible when I think about it not too long later. Especially the times where I would just keep quiet and let my ego get the better of me and hence preventing me from asking for forgiveness.

Although I am 23 as of now, I still act like a child in front of the both of you. Who wouldn't? Anyone, old or young when their parents are with them, they are bound to be childish somewhat, to feel their parents love as they always did.

I want to ask for your dear forgiveness again my dear mother, on this sacred day dedicated to all mothers. I am so sorry, I really do, as I recall back the moments yesterday. Maybe I am the only son in this entire planet that does not wish his mother a Happy Mother's Day with a gift.

I remember the times you put up with my anger and my stubbornness, and take it with a calm way even as I shout back and ignore your calls. I regret all those moments.
I just want you back. I never want to rebel again, I promise. God help me in succeeding that.

I just want to be comforted by your loving words and arms again, like a mother would. The times when you would cook, clean the house even when I am around, I don't appreciate it. I didn't appreciate the times I had being with all of you, the times we laughed together watching movies.

I am not perfect whatsoever I know. I always try to be better, to be someone that you can be proud of in the future.

I want to say I am really sorry, Mummy.
And A Happy Mother's Day.

Please Forgive me....

Your son (eldest),
Danny
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I am sure we had our times when we literally danced with the devil itself. It terms of dancing, I mean as if in committing unspeakable acts that even the mind refuses to believe it.

The devil was literally in my soul tonight, when I seriously did it.
I wished it was murder, or even the befouling of some sanctified place or entity. I truly have sunk deep. Deep indeed to the depths where I could even barely see my own hands.

The feeling after you committed it.. it consumes you like a blazing inferno, engulfing your literal being, leaving you naked towards the harsh, realistic truth of the matter.

I did it.

But where was my mind when I committed it?
It wasn't there.
It was replaced by a darker, more twisted and crazier replica of my lateral thoughts; it completely substituted me for the time I was covered by awful sin.

It is scary when I think about it. It was barely moments ago.
But the guilt, grips me like a vise, torturing me with its painful needles into the very hem of my soul, and the sound of accusation rang loud, reverberating in a jarring endless screech.
It hasn't stopped. Even as I write.

I wouldn't think, what was I thinking then?
Because I have thought that a plenty times, and it didn't stop me from doing it again. And again. And again.


These vile doings of mine. Will ever it be forgiven?
Honestly, even I can't look at myself the same way again.

Funny how desperation of the matter leads you to do very inhumane acts.

I beg for forgiveness once again, from the Lord who is merciful. Cleanse me with thy blood, and make me clean and sanctified from all things evil.
I pray to you, make me strong, give me the strength to combat these unholy desires. I am sick of it all. I want.. to be free.

I want to be normal again..
I want to be... a regular person..

I am definitely not used to posting blog posts within the half an hour after I have already posted one.

For a socially awkward person like me, who even refuses to say hi at any new stranger he adds, it can be considered as an act of desperation to garner attention in a subliminal manner.

Didn’t understand what I wrote there? Neither did I.

This post comes as a culmination from a 10 minute conversation with a friend regarding weddings and love. I, being the silly puppet of fate, reminisced about a time where I used to picture weddings of my crush. About 5 years ago, when I was young and stupid as well as liking this particular female, like hell.

In any case, I actually imagined the wedding; gardens, cakes, flowers, white dresses, crying parents, jeering friends... and then came the worst part.

I imagined life after wedding, and how would it be like living with her and stuff in the household. F*cking imagine that would you? I mean, at that time, I would say it was all candies and spice. But now, down the road of adulthood with more common sense and life lessons unwillingly driven into my mind, *shudder* I solemnly think of marriage’s unpleasant consequences to me when I eventually end up with her, or even anyone else.

Pardon the usage of crude words in my post. It was, a necessary evil.

Also, I ache to write about my friend’s wedding moments. Truly, anyone who watched the royal wedding on live TV, would imagine what would that moment be when they eventually get shackled, balls to chain for life.

At this point in reading, you would actually surmise the fact that this post is basically demonizing marriage. The pact between two humans, sanctified and revered by God, the Son and The Holy Spirit, may it last forever and until death do them apart.

I would want to quote that last part, the ‘till death to us part, that sentence yeah. The groom, or even bride, that utters those fateful binding words, is bound to each other like Faust did to Lucifer. Later in their marriage they would realize that they would be actually aiming for that little, yet infamous quote. By actually dying. Who dies first? Leave it to the husband and tehe wife after years of marriage turmoil. Affairs, money, children, even relatives could be the cause of that turmoil.

Ok, back to my friend’s situation. She, being obviously a female, because only girls who are madly in love these days could only fantasize that kind of nonsense. You don’t hear guys spouting to his dudes in an Irish bar about how his future bride will be like, wearing what, where it will be held, and the whole nine yards. If he eventually did, which is most probably out of exhilaration of getting his first girlfriend, he would be jeered and probably get whacked in the balls for uttering ridiculous nonsense in front of the fellow single guys in the bar, or guys who want time out from the wife at home.

Why do I keep railing off track?? Back to her. *fumes*

She fantasized about a wedding, after watching the royal Brits getting knotted at somewhere in London. I can tell you, she would’ve gone on about the dresses that she is going to get if I hadn’t told her about my a long dead experience with me imagining myself. Scroll back up for actual details.

So, she imagined a wedding at a beach, or a garden, and with a wedding dress that is definitely prettier than the British royal bride, and how long her hair would be at that point. I foolishly added my imagination about my former crush, and somehow this post is birthed through those two ideas literally intercourse with one another and conceived a ridiculous rant.

Not much I wrote eventually. I am never much of a wedding person. Considering if you found out rather recently.